Wisdom from Books

<b>Wisdom from Books</b>
Stephen Lau's website to help you get the wisdom to live as if everything is a miracle!

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Type of Parenting for Smart Babies

Type of Parenting for Smart Babies

Smart babies come smart parents, who know how to raise and nurture smart babies. However, to be smart parents, you must know your real self.

“Knowing others is intelligence.
Knowing ourselves is true wisdom.
Overcoming others is strength.
Overcoming ourselves is true power.”
Lao Tzu, “Tao Te Ching” (chapter 33)

Lao Tzu, the ancient sage from China, rightfully said that to know one’s true self is not easy: it requires profound wisdom. Sometimes we think that we know ourselves—who we really are—but in fact we don’t. Asking probing and self-intuitive questions may help us get to the bottom of the truth about ourselves.

Who are you as a parent?

First and foremost, best parents are not infallible; nobody is perfect, and you are no exception.

Look back at your own childhood. You may have been influenced by how your parents acted towards you. There might have been positive and negative experiences. Now, your goal as a parent is to emulate the positive aspects of your parents, and to avoid repeating their mistakes.

Types of Parenting

Parenting style generally falls into three types, although there may be overlaps and variations.

Authoritative Parents

Authoritative parents often provide an environment of freedom and democracy. They set rules and regulations that their children must follow or obey. However, within these boundaries, children are encouraged to act, speak, and think independently without any restrain or restriction. Authoritative parents are always in control of their children, but they also encourage from their children’s verbal exchange and creative thinking based on different situations and circumstances.

Authoritative parents generally produce happy, smart, and self-reliant children.

Permissive Parenting

Permissive parents are generally accepting and non-punitive regarding their children’s attitudes and behaviors. In many ways, their children’s actions and reactions, as well as their desires and impulses control and determine the parent-child relationships. The only drawbacks are that these children tend to become less self-reliant and initiating.

Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian parents are always much in control of the behaviors of their children based on their own standards; they attempt to shape the growth and development of their children. Other than obedience, there is not much room for any compromise or even flexibility. Children under authoritarian parents are generally distrustful, discontented, and withdrawn. Worse, they often become rebellious in adolescence.

The style of parenting is based on the parents’ beliefs, values, personality, and upbringing. To make your baby smart, you need to give him an environment of safety, peace and harmony. Parenting, like marriage, is partnership; make sure that both of you are on the same page.

What type of a parent are you?

Stephen Lau
Copyright©2018 by Stephen Lau

Monday, August 20, 2018

Chinese Diagnostic Approach to Disease and Healing

Chinese Diagnostic Approach to Disease and Healing

Chinese medicine, with its thousands of years of history of development through trial and error, is different from Western medicine in many respects, and one of which is its diagnostic approach to disease and healing. According to Chinese medicine, disease diagnosis is important not just from the standpoint of healing but also from the perspective of preventing disease in the future.

In traditional Chinese medicine, disease diagnosis is not about running tests on the patient, as in the case of Western medicine; instead, it is about taking and evaluating data of the patient in terms of "yin" and "yang" as well as the "deficiency" or "excess” of  "qi," which is the internal life energy coursing through the meridians connecting all the body organs. Given that Chinese medicine focuses on the balance of "yin" and "yang" Chinese healing is based on the harmony of "yin" and "yang" expressed in the Five Elements, which represent different body organs, as well as the free flow of "qi." Any blockage or stagnation of "qi" will result in "deficiency"or "excess," either of which will lead to disharmony or disease. The purpose of Chinese diagnostic approach to disease and healing is to find out not only the causes but also the underlying patterns of disharmony, thereby instrumental in promoting natural cures as well as preventing relapses in the future.

For thousands of years, in Chinese health system, disease diagnosis has been comprehensive in that it includes the environment, the social factors, and the conditions of the patient, such as food and nutrition, as well as lifestyle. Therefore, Chinese diagnostic approach to disease and healing is detailed and all-inclusive.

In Chinese medicine today, diagnosis begins with data collection through observing, asking, listening, and touching.
The first level of Chinese disease diagnosis is visual inspection and observation of shen or spirit. Shen is the spirit of the body, manifested in the consciousness, personality, intellect, and other abstract qualities. Disharmony of shen in the patient is reflected in confused or distorted thinking, heavy body motion, dull and slow response, insomnia, and other mental and psychological disorders and problems. On the other hand, good shen is revealed in good eye contact, clear skin, and healthy complexion. The presence of shen, or the lack of it, is basically a reflection of the balance or disharmony of “yin” and “yang.”

The second visual diagnosis is the examination of the colors associated with the internal organs on the surface of the skin, such as red for heart, green for liver, yellow for spleen, white for lungs, and black for kidneys. Chinese medical practitioners look for specific places to identify the colors associated with different body organs; for example, the skin under the eyes, the temples, the skin by the nose, the lips, and the forearms are strategic areas for physicians to identify colors of the patient for disease diagnosis.

The most important observation is that of the tongue. For centuries, Chinese physicians have extensively observed the size and shape (e.g. long or short; swollen or thin; cracked or smooth), the contour, the margins, and the color of the tongue to determine the presence of disease and the overall health of an individual. To illustrate, the light or heavy coating of the tongue indicates the absence or presence of body fluids (stomach fluids); if the coat is thick, the fluids are sluggish; a thick white coat is considered normal and indicative of a relative fluid balance; a blackish coat indicates internal imbalance.

The lifestyle of the patient, such as his or her appetite, diet, digestion, elimination, sweat, sleep, energy level, exercise, and sexual activity, among others, is also part of the diagnostic approach to disease and healing.

Listening and smelling are other unobtrusive methods of disease diagnosis. In listening diagnosis, the Chinese physician listens for sound of voice and quality of speech to determine the health conditions of the patient. In smelling, the physician uses body odor, or quality of breath to determine the intensity of internal imbalance of the patient.

Touching is based on the pulse of the patient--a major index of the patient's internal health. In Chinese medicine, there are twenty-eight types of pulses, according to their speed, width, length, and rhythm. The abnormalities of the pulse indicate weakness or excess of "qi" in different body organs.

In Western medicine, doctors look for one single point where disease begins, and treatment is applied to remove or suppress the symptoms associated with the disease. The Chinese diagnostic approach to disease and healing is much more comprehensive and extensive in that the diagnosis aims at finding an underlying pattern of disharmony and identifying the organ and meridian that are the culprits, thereby instrumental in designing healing strategies for the disease.

For more information on Chinese healing, visit my website: Chinese Natural Healing.

Stephen Lau
Copyright © 20108 by Stephen Lau

Thursday, August 16, 2018

Anti-Aging Is Health Over Looks

Anti-Aging Is Health Over Looks

Anti-aging is health over looks.

The first perception of aging is the face that is full of lines and wrinkles. That is why so many people focus on plastic surgery and facelift to keep a youthful-looking face. But, at some point, the face may become irreparable, complemented by an aging body. By then, there is no other way, except acceptance.

Nicole Kidman, the Hollywood actress, once said: “You have to love your smile lines. . .you have to love your frown lines. . .” Essentially, what she meant was that you have to be brave as well as to be proud not to be like everyone else—that is, going for Botox or a facelift.

Yes, at some point in time, we all have to admit that we are getting old: our face and our body tell everything! Break the aging taboo, and endorse the marvels of aging.

People say you get smarter as you get older. But getting smarter means having healthier attitudes towards aging, and, more importantly, overcoming the fear of aging. Fear is a negative emotion, which accentuates and accelerates the aging process. Celebrate your aging, and live every day of your life to the fullest—that is healthy aging at its best.

Don’t spend the latter half of your life fighting a battle that you know you are going to lose ultimately anyway. No matter what you do, your looks will be gone forever. Instead, spend your time wisely to make yourself age healthily and gracefully. At some point in your life, you will realize that taking care of your health is the most important thing—much more than taking care of your looks. Why don’t you take that responsibility right now? Forget about your looks! Focus on your health, instead of on your looks, to stop the aging process!

Get the gifts of life: joy, health, and longevity!

Stephen Lau
Copyright © 2018 by Stephen Lau

Monday, August 13, 2018

The Wisdom of Ancient Health and Healing Systems

The Wisdom of Ancient Health and Healing Systems

Wisdom is the ability to gather, process, and interpret information so as to make wise choices in actions that will ultimately transform the body and the mind. Wisdom does not come from above; it has to be acquired. Therefore, empower yourself with the wisdom on natural self-healing.

The wisdom of some of the ancient health and healing systems manifests the importance of well-being and the power of natural healing:

1. Hippocrates (born around 450 B.C.) was the Father of Medicine. His Greek medical system was based on moderation for a balanced lifestyle in harmony with nature for natural healing. Hippocrates once said: "A wise man ought to realize that health is his most valuable possession, and learn how to treat his illnesses by his own judgment." So pay attention to what your body is telling you; your body symptoms often reflect internal disharmony, or indicate the imminence of disease. Nobody knows your own body's constitution better than yourself—not even your doctors or medical professionals.

2.  The Tibetan health system came under the influence of Buddha, and Tibetan monks practiced compassion and mindfulness, which comprise the essence of mental and emotional wellness requisite for natural self-healing. Remember, healing begins with the mind first, not the body; it is always mind over matter. Tibetan medicine also emphasizes virtuous conduct, a healthy diet, regular daily activity and seasonal routines to promote all-round health and natural healing. Furthermore, the Tibetan medical system heavily relies on herbal cures for natural healing.

For more information on Tibetan natural healing, go to: The Five Tibetan Rites.

3. The Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) also embraces an extensive herbal medicine. More importantly, for thousands of years, Chinese doctors have believed that "qi" (internal life energy) flows throughout the body by way of channels or meridians. This internal life force is capable of continuous circulation provided there is balance between opposite forces of "yin" and "yang" which are energies of the universe, expressed in the Five Elements (the Earth, the Water, the Metal, the Fire, the Wood). Imbalance results in stagnation or blockage of "qi", which is the cause of disease.

For more information on Chinese healing, visit my web sites: Chinese Natural Healing.

4. The Ayurveda system in India is the "science of life" that has been practiced for thousands of years. This medical system advocates all inclusiveness for natural healing. Essentially, any doctrinal or ideological imperative must defer to the well-being of the patient. In other words, Ayurveda not only eliminates the process of disease but also restores the health of the patient to its original physical, mental, and emotional well-being.

Get  more information,on Ayurvedic Treatments.

The major difference between the wisdom of these long-standing health systems and that of modern Western medicine is that the former has a holistic approach to health, focusing on the prevention and the natural self-healing of disease, while the latter emphasizes the cure and the removal of disease symptoms. Today's medical doctors tend to specialize in exquisitely narrow fields of anatomic and physiologic expertise that they have little time to observe the general wellness of their patients. But the wisdom of healing is to make whole of your health and wellness.

Stephen Lau
Copyright © 2018 by Stephen Lau

Thursday, August 9, 2018

Inner Beauty

If you are a woman, you would want to be beautiful, youthful, and forever young, even though you're now a mother..

What is beauty? Is beauty only skin deep, or something only in the beholder’s eye?

In the Orient, the perception of beauty may vary from that in the West: the focus in the East on inner beauty or the "inner eye" may sometimes seem difficult for the Western mind to comprehend.

The traditional Oriental perception of beauty may have the following inner innate qualities:

1. Compassion for others

2. Detachment from negative thoughts and feelings

3. Peace of mind and inner tranquility

4. Right-mindedness from a true heart

A truly beautiful woman has a serene face with a softening spirit. Such a face is often a reflection of the physical, the mental, and the spiritual aspects of that individual. Beauty is more than skin deep: it exudes inner confidence and radiance.

You may become aware of the first click of your biological clock around age 30, when your first streaks of silver appear on your hair, or around 35 when you first notice your crow’s feet (for some, this may have happened much sooner). Can you turn back the biological clock?

According to Phyllis R. Koch-Sheras, clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Virginia in Charlottesville, understanding the changes and learning how to accept and cope with them are anti-aging strategies.

Complement your inner beauty with your extrinsic beauty. Nature has given you a lovely face: take good care of it and preserve it diligently with daily facial regimens to make you forever look the best of your age.

Your skin is your beauty. The youthful look of a person is primarily based on the skin of that individual. After all, the first impression of a person is the face: the skin color, the skin texture, and the feel and touch of the skin. Your skin renews itself every 35 to 45 days. Do not interrupt or slow down that skin cell replication process with alcohol or nicotine. Get right and get enough sleep. Above all, do everything you can to maintain its color, texture, and softness. Makeup only masks the defects.

Naturally Skinsational: It provides natural skincare recipes to keep your skin youthful and healthy. It saves you a lot of money on cosmetics that don't work.

Stephen Lau
Copyright© 2018 by Stephen Lau

Monday, August 6, 2018

Pleasure Is Not Happiness

Many people who are depressed seek pleasure to overcome their depression. But pleasure does not bring happiness, nor does it help them get out of their depression. Therefore, it is important to know the differences between pleasure and happiness.

Pleasure is having fun at a party, the excitement of new experiences, the thrill and passion of sex, or the delights of a fine meal. They are all wonderful life experiences to be cherished and cultivated by any individual, but they are only life pleasures, not human happiness.

The truth of the matter is that all our wonderful life experiences are only to be enjoyed, and then to be let go of, just as a delicious meal is to be enjoyed, savored, and then to be digested, and ultimately eliminated from the body. Therefore, any life pleasure is fleeting and must be so—if it is to continue to please again in the future.

Happiness, on the other hand, may be less fleeting and more enduring than pleasure; but, still, happiness never lasts forever because nothing in life is permanent, and every thing remains only with that very moment, whether it is happiness or pleasure.


Happiness and pleasure are life experiences to be enjoyed, cherished, and remembered—but they do not last forever.

A State of Mind

“Happiness is a state of mind” Walt Disney

“Heaven is a state of mind, not a location” Wayne Dyer

Happiness or unhappiness is no more and no less than a state of mind of an individual. It may or may not involve the five senses, although they often play a pivotal role in creating the happiness or unhappiness state of mind of an individual.

Remember, your state of mind is always different from that of others; everyone’s state of mind is uniquely different, just like the uniqueness of human fingerprints.

Happiness is a feeling of contentment, of personal conviction that life is just as it should be; unhappiness is just the opposite feeling. But how do you gauge your own level of contentment? And what convinces you that your life is what it should be? Happiness or unhappiness, to you, is only your own state of mind—uniquely yours and yours alone.

Stephen Lau
Copyright©2018 by Stephen Lau

Thursday, August 2, 2018

Good Posture for Super-Aging

Good Posture for Super-Aging

If you wish to live long, improve your posture. Good posture holds the key to super-aging

Physical activity extends longevity; it is one of the closest things to an anti-aging pill for longevity. Physical activity invigorates the whole body system, keeping it in its optimum conditions. Unfortunately, there is often a dramatic decline in physical activity as aging continues. Partly, it is due to the onslaught of diseases and disorders, which incapacitate an individual. Partly, it is due to poor posture acquired by that individual over the years.

Why is good posture so important, and why is it often neglected?

If you have good posture, you have good body balance, which prevents falling—one of the most common causes of death in the elderly. As a matter of fact, falling is the 2nd leading cause of death in women aged between 65 and 85, and the leading cause of death for most individuals over 85. Improve posture to improve body balance to prevent falling, which is due to weak body muscles, aggravated and perpetuated by incorrect posture.

Another good reason for good posture is to avoid debilitating back pain, neck pain, leg pain, and even headaches, which often interfere with super-aging. Due to poor body posture, all the muscle groups supporting the crooked spine become stretched and strained, causing wear and tear, resulting in lower back pain. In addition, an arched lower back exerts undue pressure on the joints and nerves, causing joint pain and rheumatism.

There is yet another good reason to improve posture: enhanced breathing. Healthy breathing not only provides ample oxygen to your lungs for long-term longevity health, but also nourishes, in the form of qi (internal vital life energy), different parts of your body for maximum growth and rejuvenation. Good posture contributes to breathing right. Incidentally, rodents, with the shortest breaths in the animal kingdom, also have the shortest lifespan. Therefore, breathing correctly is an important component of super-aging. But you cannot breathe right without correct posture.

Despite the importance of good posture for super-aging, correct posture is often overlooked because there is no one constantly reminding you to improve posture. To successfully improve posture, you must develop an acute awareness for good posture at all times.

Good posture means in any standing position, you body posture should be as follows:

Your head is directly above your shoulders.
Your chin is tucked in.
Your ear, shoulder, and hip are in a straight line from a side view.
Your upper back is straight, not slouched.
Your shoulders, relaxed and straight, are flat against your back.
Your pelvis is in a neutral position.
Your knees are unlocked. 

Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau