As If Everything Is A Miracle.

I have just published my book "As If Everything Is A Miracle" on Amazon.

In this day and age, living in different phases of life is challenging. For one thing, in this world of technology and information, many of us are addicted to speed, which seems like a prerequisite for success in career and in many others facets of life. As a result, stress is unduly created, which may lead to toxic actions, reactions, thoughts and emotions. Consciously and subconsciously we have created for ourselves a world in which our bodies, our minds, and souls have become toxic and we live as if nothing is a miracle.

To do just the opposite -- living as if everything is a miracle -- we have to renew the mind,  renew the body, and reconnect the soul, and realign the being so that we know who we really are, instead of who we "think" we are.

This 125-page book is about the wisdom in living as if everything is a miracle. Albert Einstein once said: "There are only two ways to live your life. One is as if nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is a miracle."

Life is a miracle; even your breath is a miracle in itself. To live your life as if everything is a miracle, you need wisdom of the body, the mind, and the soul.

The body perceives all sensations and experiences in the physical world. The mind interprets and registers them in the subconscious mind, which controls the conscious mind in its daily life choices and decisions, resulting in actions, non-actions, and reactions of the body in the physical world. The soul feeds the mind with spirituality that provides connection and interconnection with others through empathy and compassion, gratitude and generosity, as well as love and forgiveness. The body, the mind, and the soul—all play a pivotal role in wisdom in contemporary living. The essence of this wisdom is their “alignment” with one another for balance and harmony in the being of an individual.

Having said that, living in the physical world, the body can easily become toxic, and its toxins may contaminate the mind due to the scientifically proven body-mind connection. A toxic mind is filled with toxic thoughts and memories, which result in toxic choices and decisions that further exacerbate the toxic body with its toxic actions, reactions, and behaviors in the physical world. The spiritual guidance of the soul is often ignored by a toxic mind.

You mind provides the map for your body to go on your life journey, and your soul is the compass; without the compass and map, you are going nowhere, and you live your life as if nothing is a miracle.

This 125-page book provides information on how you can rethink your mind, renew your body, and reconnect your soul for alignment of your being to live your life as if everything is a miracle. Click here to download your copy.

Stephen Lau 

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Your Phone, Your Being, Your Health

Nowadays, almost everyone has a phone. You live by your phone, and you can't survive without it because everything about your life is stored inside your phone. Your phone has become your being. Honestly, can you live without your phone? Probably not.

If your phone is your being, most likely you feel that time flies, that you are always on the verge of good health and success but never quite getting them, that even you have some achievements in your life and yet you are not quite enjoying the fruits of your success, and that you are always struggling with something you can never identify or understand.  If your use your phone all the time, and your life has evolved around your phone, it has, indeed, become your being.

Without a doubt, we are all living in a world of speed. and many of us have developed a compulsive mind without even knowing it, as evidenced by our overuse of the phone. Well, what is a compulsive mind? A compulsive mind is one which is always shuffling between the past and the future, but rarely stays in the present. A compulsive mind is about doing, and not being. That's why a compulsive mind cannot quiet down, let alone rest. A compulsive mind, which is essentially a distressed mind, is the source of imbalance and disharmony in the mind, and thus leading to disease and disorder in the body because the body and the mind are interconnected.  Science has attested to the body-mind connection in human health.

Do you have a compulsive mind? You may have a compulsive mind if you talk on the phone while driving. Being means you are living in the present moment; that is, you have presence of mind in what you are doing right now. Talking on the phone while driving means your mind is on the phone, and you have put driving on autopilot. Are you talking on the phone, or are you driving? Which is more important? Your mind can be present moment to moment on doing only one thing at a time. Multitasking distracts the mind and blunts its mental awareness, which is critical to a healthy body.

Mental awareness or mindfulness holds the key to good health. Your body communicates with your mind through messages to warn you of the imminence of a disease or disorder. But without mindfulness, you may not recognize the subtle signs and symptoms in the form of fatigue, discomfort, restlessness, aches and pains. In addition, according to research studies, mindfulness strengthens your immune system to protect you from disease.

The bottom line: enhance your mindfulness with moment-to-moment presence of mind. The simplest and easiest way to practice mindfulness is to focus on your breaths. Again, most of us are totally unaware of our breaths unless we have breathing problems. But breaths give us life; without our breaths, we die more or less instantly. Practice mindfulness to sharpen your mental alertness by noticing your breathing in and breathing out through your nostrils. You can do this anytime and anywhere if you choose to -- just give your mind a meaningful break from its compulsive thoughts.

Or, next time, when your phone rings, don't pick it up; instead notice your breaths to slow down your mind. Your mindfulness is much more important than that phone call!

Remember, stress is the root cause of all human miseries and diseases. Mindfulness is the antidote to stress. Be present to the now. The past was gone, the future is unknown, and only the present is real, and that's why it is called "present" because it is a gift from above.

  

Stephen Lau 

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Overcoming Wedding Stress

My daughter got married in May, 2013 -- almost a year ago. Now as I look back, it was a wonderful wedding: it was a simple wedding, very well planned, and everybody enjoyed it.  Now it's May, and you may be hearing wedding bells: loved ones, friends and relatives are getting or planning to get married.

A wedding is a lifetime grand event for great celebration. However, it may create undue stress. Planning a wedding may take months or even more than a year, and therefore the stress may be cumulative and protracted. Overcoming wedding stress, you need to understand the causes of wedding stress. 

There are four main causes of wedding stress:

Money is the major factor in wedding stress. A wedding is about spending money, and financial stress is often a byproduct of a wedding. An average wedding in the United States may cost between $20,000 and $30,000, and a 5-tier wedding cake could have a price tag of well over $2,000, not to mention the other accessories that come with the celebration, such as wedding attire, the ceremony and the reception, among others. Everything costs money, and money creates stress, especially in this economic environment.

The second cause of wedding stress is the wedding planning with the many details of the wedding. Although it is often just a one-day event, a wedding involves many details, such as the ceremony, the reception, the honeymoon, the bachelorette parties, the rehearsal dinner, the bridal dress, the bouquets and flowers, the gifts and favors, the decoration, and the photography, among others. Each comes with its many unique details that demand attention and planning, involving a multitude of venues and personnel. On top of that, they  are often a source of conflicts, disagreements, and disputes among those involved..

Time element is another cause of wedding stress. Wedding planning requires time to put everything in the right order and in the right place. However, procrastination, a common human weakness, may become the source of stress and hassle in the planning and the outcome of the wedding.

Finally, man proposes but God disposes. Unpleasant surprises and mishaps may get in the way during the planning process, or worse, on the wedding day. No matter how organized and thoughtful is your planning, something may go wrong, such as the vendor has gone out of business, the Maid of Honor has fallen sick, or the photographer has failed to turn up due to an accident. 

To overcome wedding stress, you must plan ahead, give yourself sufficient time to deal with all the anticipated and unforeseeable issues.while planning a wedding.

If money is no object to you, by all means plan a lavish wedding. However, many of us do not have that luxury at our disposal, so the option is to go for a budget wedding, in which all unnecessary costs have been eliminated and all wedding items have been acquired at their best prices. A budget wedding is essentially a "resoureful" wedding based on the principle of "dollars and sense." It is important to understand that a wedding, which is only a one-day event, is only a part of a marriage, and that it is crucial for a married couple to enter into their married life without incurring a big consumer debt. The bottom line: Spend according to your means.

Planning a wedding is no easy task. For this reason, it is important to involve your family members and close friends as well; you don't have to listen to them, but they may help you one way or the other. Delegate them with fun errands and wedding projects. Don't try to do everything yourself. Learn to relax and enjoy the planning process.

Conflicts and disagreements are inevitable during the planning process. Look upon wedding planning as an opportunity to experience what married life is all about. For a marriage to work, a couple must understand each other's needs, differences and preferences, and, most importantly, the need for compromise. Planning based on agreement and disagreement will help the couple to prepare for the married life ahead ofthem. To deal with time stress and procrastination, get yourself organized. If both you and your partner are unorganized, consider hiring a wedding consultant, even though it adds cost to the budget. 

No matter how careful you may have been with your wedding planning, something may still go wrong. Look at everything in perspective. Just remember that the wedding is only a small part of your marriage. Don't lose focus on what is the most important: your marriage, not the wedding. It is the love and bond with your future spouse that matters, so fully utilize wedding planning to enhance that love and bond. Keep this in perspective whenever you feel any wedding stress.

Just be yourself, and learn how to relax and enjoy the engagement and experience of wedding planning prior to the wedding.

Stephen Lau 
Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Is There Another Way to Live Your Life?

The mind controls everything: how you  think, how your experience what happens to you, how you perceive your past and present experiences, how you anticipate your future expectations, how you make  decisions and take actions that affect your future experiences. In short, your thoughts become the raw materials with which you weave the fabric of your life.

Unfortunately, we were never taught how to think. Albert Einstein rightly said: “Thinking is difficult; that’s why so few people do it.”

You are who you are and what you have  now become because of how you think; that is, your thoughts have become you.  Given that life is complex, and living is never simple,  it is important that you know how to control your mind, and hence your  thoughts to enable you to make the best and the most out of your life.

When you were young in the early phase  of growth and development, you were exposed to the world around through your five senses; then your mind began to process what you perceived in your  experiences, generalizing and interpreting it according toy our mental input, and applying it whenever and wherever you thought appropriate and applicable. Over the years, these perceptions and experiences have made you think this is  who you are. You seldom challenge your thoughts.

 

If you have not been living a life of your dream, most probably it is because your mind has been pre-conditioned by your thoughts. Remember, where you are right now is only temporary -- conditioned by your mindset. If you can change your thoughts, you can change your life; it's just that simple!

We are all living in a belief-generated world, and our beliefs are generated by the media, the people around us, and, most notably, by ourselves in our subconscious minds. Our beliefs create our own reality in life. If we believe we can change for the better, we can. On the other hand, for instance, if we believe we are victimized by our fate, then our victim mentality will keep us in that state indefinitely until we change that negative mindset. To make any significant change in how we think, we must separate ourselves from our thoughts, and this requires mental awareness. To develop and enhance this mental awareness, we must, first of all, have the intent to change, that is, our total responsibility for what is happening to us or what we have become.

Now, you can see how powerful your mind is. Yes, there is always another way to live your life; nothing is set in stone. If you don't like the life you are living now, don't just sit there, whining and complaining about this and that. Do something about it! Your mind is the most powerful life tool. Make good use of it.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

 

 

Zen Living in Contemporary Life

Contemporary life is like a pressure cooker into which are dumped obsessive thoughts and worries about career, money, children, relationships, health, and social responsibilities. As a result, contemporary living is hectic and stressful. The human mind often becomes a victim of undue tension and distress.

Stress is a complex problem involving the body's response to increased mental tension, which is a byproduct of contemporary living. 

Learn to live by Zen. 

What is Zen, or the way of Zen?

Zen is a way of living, which is crucial to contemporary living. Zen is a philosophy of living to deal with stress. Make no mistake, Zen is not a religious belief. Despite having its origin from Buddha, Zen is not the foundation of Buddhism. Zen is only a philosophical approach to human happiness through intellectual cultivation.

The word “Zen” is Japanese, but it derives from the Chinese, meaning “meditation.” It is an Oriental mental practice for self-enlightenment. More specifically, Zen is a transcendental mental state that affects the overall physical and mental well-being of an individual. 

Zen cultivates intuitive knowing, which is naturally knowing the ultimate truth of living. According to the ancient philosopher Plato, life is a process of “forgetting” with episodes of experiences and happenings that can make you “forget” how to live. The way of Zen is to help you re-discover that innate wisdom of knowing the eternal truth of living. That re-discovery is “self-awakening,” which cannot be taught but can only be intuited through stillness of the mind attained in meditation. Through "self-enlightenment," you will be liberated from the shackles of memories of the past and worries of the future. 

The way of Zen is simple: live in the present. Unfortunately, most of us don't live in the present: we live in the past, rummaging through memories of both pleasant and unpleasant experiences, and then projecting them into the future, striving to repeat the pleasant ones and to avoid the unpleasant ones. That is how many of us live in the past and the future, but not in the present. In the process of picking and choosing, we create not only stress for ourselves but also problems that did not exist in the first place. Zen living is living in the present, embracing whatever that may come along in life, without picking and choosing, and learning from both the pleasant and unpleasant experiences. Essentially, Zen living is learning how to relax by acquiring the wisdom of neither avoiding problems in life, nor seeking solutions to problems that might not even have existed in the first place.

Contemporary way of life is often an unhealthy lifestyle: it is much like living in a pressure cooker. The endless challenges, demands, and goals continue to churn out stress in every form. 

Zen living focuses on the present moment—not the past, and surely not the future. 

Zen living teaches us to relax through meditation that may give us the "self-enlightenment" to truly understand the essentials of life and living. 

The essence of Zen living may be summarized in the following Zen poem: 

"The perfect Way is without difficulty.

Save that it avoids picking and choosing.

Only when you stop liking and disliking

Will all be clearly understood.

A split hair's difference

And heaven and earth are set apart.

If you want to get the plain truth,

Be not concerned with right and wrong.

The conflict between right and wrong

Is the sickness of the mind."

from an old Zen poem

Start Zen: Learn the healing art of Zen meditation. Free yourself from the thoughts and emotions that are holding you back in your life. Dramatically improve the quality of your life by enhancing the quality of your mind.

Living By Zen: Learn to live a life of inner peace without stress from Dr. Brenda Shoshanna, the famous psychologist and best-selling author. .

Read my books: The Book of Life and Living -- a blueprint for living a stress-free life through an integration of the ancient wisdom of Tao, the contemporary wisdom, and Biblical wisdom; Your Golden Years and Santa Claus -- a book on the wisdom in living your best in your senior years. .

Visit my website: Wisdom in Living.

Stephen Lau

Copyright © by Stephen Lau

Toxic Desires in a Toxic Body

With a physical body, we are all living in a physical world often filled with toxic desires. Do not let the body become toxic too.

In the physical world, our bodies with their five senses (seeing, smelling, tasting, hearing, and touching) are constantly exposed to sensual sensations around us that may create desires in our bodies. In addition, we all have both a conscious and subconscious mind that process and interpret our physical sensations, leading to thoughts that may be positive or negative, depending on our mental input. The mind plays a pivotal role in changing negative thoughts into toxic desires in a toxic body.

Our conscious minds voluntarily control our mental input (that is, what we want to remember and what we want to forget); but our subconscious minds involuntarily absorb all physical sensations we are exposed to.  The subconscious mind is the master mind behind all actions that the conscious mind takes; therefore, it is important to have the wisdom to understand better how the subconscious mind works in order to have better control of the conscious mind, lest the subconscious mind create toxic desires in a toxic body.  

To illustrate, according to CNN (1/24/2014), Bob McDonnell “was once one of the Republican Party's rising stars. There was even talk of his running for the White House. But today, the former Virginia Governor and his wife are charged with taking gifts from a local businessman in exchange for using the governor's position to help his company.”

Four years ago, McDonnell was sworn in as governor. Demonstrating his potential as a rising political star, he gave an outstanding GOP response to President Barack Obama's State of the Union address; he had won back the governor’s office from Democrats by double digits.

But now McDonnell and his wife are both facing criminal indictment for taking expensive gifts, including luxurious Rolex watches, they were not supposed to.

In politics, there are always political rock stars tumbling to fallen stars at their own hands due to their toxic desires in their toxic bodies. Some survived (like Bill Clinton), but most ended their careers in disgrace.

How could a political rock star become a fallen star? Toxic desires in a toxic body!

We all have desires, which come from our five senses. For example, when we see something that pleases the eye, such as an expensive Rolex gold watch, we become desirous of it. That perception can be voluntarily rejected by the conscious mind, but it may be imprinted involuntarily on the subconscious mind, which, unfortunately, controls and directs the conscious mind. So, if the conscious mind does not even voluntarily reject the perception, it may become a toxic desire. Ideally, the mind should control the body, but if the body controls the mind, that is, letting the toxic desire get out of control, the mind will do just anything and everything—even to the extent of breaking the law—to gratify that desire of the body. That’s how toxic desires in a toxic body come into being.

Learn how to increase your mind power to control your subconscious mind to your advantage.

Mind Secrets Exposed: Learn the art of getting what you want out of life. If you find yourself facing constant frustration from never-ending problems in life, or you feel as though your life is a proverbial treadmill, not going anywhere. Now is the time to take charge of your life. It is all in your subconscious mind that is the real power center of your being and the "headquarters" of your body. Use state-of-the-art subliminal messages to transform your subconscious mind in order to change your conscious mind.

Get more information on mind-wellness wisdom from my newsletter: Wellness Wisdom Newsletter.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Wellness Wisdom 2014 Newsletter

I have just published “Wellness Wisdom 2014 Newsletter.” The goal is to share with you information and tips regarding wellness of the body, the mind, and the soul, all play a pivotal role in our overall wellness and well-being.

In this 2014, many of us have made our different resolutions to change ourselves so that we may have a better year than the previous one. Wellness is indeed a blessing from above, especially as you continue to age or you are already advanced in years. Make your golden years “golden” and not tarnished golden. To do just that you need wellness—holistic wellness of the body, the mind, and the soul.

This “Wellness Wisdom 2014 Newsletter” will be regularly updated with news, comments on news, and tips regarding health and wellness of the body, the mind, and the soul. In addition, if you subscribe to the newsletter, you will also be sent an email (on the 1^st and 15^th of each month) with information to boost your health. 

Remember, health is often not valued until it has deteriorated. To turn back the clock is a bit harder, but it could still be done—provided it is not too late. So, take matters into your own hands, and do what you can with what you have, and do your very best at that. Dr. Deepak Chopra, M.D., bestselling author, and founder of the Chopra Center for Wellbeing, once said: “If you don’t take care of your health today, you will be forced to take care of your illness tomorrow.”

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Wake Up Stretches

Stretches are important to health and wellness  because they not only eliminate muscle pain but also promote muscle flexibility, which goes a long way to preventing falls, which are common among the elderly. Use stretches to "wake up" your senses and vitalize your body for wellness. 

Dr. Robert Oexman, director of the Sleep to Live Institute, said that stretching your back prevents slipped discs, which often occur within an hour after waking up, because people get out of bed too soon and too quickly without giving the rested body time to adjust.

Extend your arms over your head and extend your legs as far as possible, as evidenced by the stretch in the tips of your fingers and toes. Meanwhile, inhale deeply through your nose. Then breathe out deeply and slowly while drawing your arms down along the side your body with your palms facing up. You will feel full relaxation in your legs. Repeat the stretches several times to energize as well as to relax your body.

Do a single / double knee hug. Start by bringing your knee into your chest. Massage your hip joint by moving your leg in circles in both directions. Repeat with the other knee. Finally, hug both knees into your chest, raising your nose to your knees as much as possible. Now relax your body and let your knees fall gently down to either side. Repeat the whole process several times for stretch and relaxation.

Use Pilates to relieve back and joint pain after waking up..

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau